The Battle for Independence

We are here and have been for a while crossing the bridge of how much is to much independence. I remember going through this with all of the other kids. Hannah being kid #4 tries so hard to do everything her older siblings do . We battle every day over "hand or up." What does that mean? That means in public places such as parking lots and stores, she has to hold my hand or I have to carry her. She of course doesn't like either option and will take off running, squirm her hand out of mine, or fight me the whole time I am holding her. I am consistent and will not let her walk in a parking lot or crowded store without having her hand or body in my hand. Well, there are some places where I am a little lax on that rule. One of those is church. She is very familiar with it and our routine and often my hands are full, so inside the building I will let her walk. She often takes off in a run, so many times after church I am seen running down the hallway to catch her so she doesn't just run on out the door. Today Hannah ran off. Let me tell you the big picture. We were eating dinner. Josh was clearing off the table, Caleb was getting a refill on his drink, Hannah followed Samantha to refill her drink. Josh came back. I saw Caleb across the room on his way back. Both girls came back. For some reason Samantha was crawling on the floor, but Hannah was right next to her. Samantha said she couldn't fit between the two occupied chairs. I didn't immediately see Hannah after that. Then I noticed two kids were not at the table. At the same time I felt someone squeezing my foot. I assumed it was Hannah since she and Samantha had crawled on the floor, but it was Caleb...I have NO idea why he was under there. We got up and started looking for Hannah. She was no where to be found. We looked in the kitchen area...no Hannah. Marc walked the hall, still no Hannah. I checked the bathroom because she has finally gotten over the fear of the new fancy hand blowers and wants to go potty every few minutes so she can wash her hands and use it. Still no Hannah. Samantha is checking under tables. Josh and Jenny (one of the Hi5 teachers who was sitting with us) were talking to Jason about an announcement over the mic. I said I was going to walk towards the library. As I was heading out the door Marc was coming back in holding Hannah's hand. I am guessing she thought we were done eating and took off to go to class. Hannah has a habit of not looking back as she is running away and obviously never noticed none of us was behind her. I think she probably made it to the staircase around the corner before she realized we weren't there. Marc said she was walking back towards him and yelled "daddy" and ran to him when she saw him. Very scary! Lesson learned too....never let your guard down. It was literally a matter of seconds...she was there, then she was GONE! We have another Josh! I can't even count how many times he has gotten distracted and wandered off. Anytime we go somewhere we have to have the what happens if you get lost talk. When he was 2...and 3...and 4 and we went places like the rodeo I was pin a note to the back of his shirt. The outside said "If I am lost" and the inside had his name, my name, and my cell phone number. Tonight we had a talk with Hannah...not that she really understood, but we also had a talk with the big kids because they set the example. If she sees them running through church to get to class, dinner, or whatever, then she will think it is ok. We talked about staying together in a group when we walk places instead of trying to be "first"---hopefully it sinks in. I still grab Caleb's hand when in parking lots and crowded places and many times Samantha will also hold my hand. I assure you, I am not lax with the safety of my kids....it just can happen to anyone anywhere and very quickly.